तिम्रो मेरो मुटु जोद्ने एउटा दामी पुल बनाउछु
बोल्छेउ त सानु एकै छिन्लाई,मन मेरो cool बनाउछु
गुलाबै हौ नि फुल्एउ कहा, भमराले चालई पाएन
माली मै छु,बगैचा दिलको,तिम्लाई सुन्दर फूल बनाउछु
तिम्रो मेरो मुटु .........
घाम पानीमा ओत दिउला बिशाल मेरो न्यानो छाती
माया मात्रै रसाउने, छाती भित्रै मूल बनाउछु
सागर भन्दा गहिरो माया बग्न दिन्न आँखा बाट
जती माया तिम्लाई दिन्छु, तेती नै पाउने rule बनाउछु
तिम्रो मेरो मुटु .........
मन मुटु र चोखो मया सुम्पन्छु म तिमीलाई नै
तर्केर हिंडे कम छैन म नि,तिमी जस्ता हुल बनाउछु
तिम्रो मेरो मुटु जोद्ने एउटा दामी पुल बनाउछु
बोल्छेउ त सानु एकै छिन्लाई,मन मेरो cool बनाउछु
(सौजन्य : हरी प्रसाद पौडेल , विद्यार्थी , पुल्चोक क्यम्पस )
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Deadlock!
Boss said to secretary: For a week we will go abroad, so make arrangement.
Secretary make call to Husband: For a week my boss and I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.
Husband make call to secret lover: My wife is going abroad for a week, so lets spend the week together.
Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving private tuition: I have work for a week, so you need not come for class.
Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a week I don't have class 'coz my teacher is busy. Lets spend the week together.
Grandpa(the 1st boss ;) ) make call to his secretary: This week I am spending my time with my grandson. We cannot attend that meeting.
Secretary make call to her husband: This week my boss has some work, we cancelled our trip.
Husband make call to secret lover: We cannot spend this week together, my wife has cancelled her trip.
Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving private tuition: This week we will have class as usual.
Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I can't give you company.
Grandpa make call to his secretary: Don't worry this week we will attend that meeting, so make arrangement .
Secretary make call to Husband: For a week my boss and I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.
Husband make call to secret lover: My wife is going abroad for a week, so lets spend the week together.
Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving private tuition: I have work for a week, so you need not come for class.
Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a week I don't have class 'coz my teacher is busy. Lets spend the week together.
Grandpa(the 1st boss ;) ) make call to his secretary: This week I am spending my time with my grandson. We cannot attend that meeting.
Secretary make call to her husband: This week my boss has some work, we cancelled our trip.
Husband make call to secret lover: We cannot spend this week together, my wife has cancelled her trip.
Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving private tuition: This week we will have class as usual.
Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I can't give you company.
Grandpa make call to his secretary: Don't worry this week we will attend that meeting, so make arrangement .
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Interesting Programming Skills
class Bachelor_female_professional
{
double styles;
short skirts;
long time_to_understand_problems;
float mind;
void knowledge();
char non_co_operative;
};
class Married_female_Software _Professional
{
double weight;
short tempered;
long gossips;
float hopes;
void work();
char unstable;
};
class Female_Engaged_software _professional
{
double time_on_phone;
short attention_on_work;
long boast;
float on_cloud_nine;
void understanding();
char edgy;
};
class Newly_Married_software _professional
{
double dinner_invitations;
short time_at_work;
long lunch_breaks;
float talks;
void bank_balance();
char hen_pecked;
};
class Husband_wife_software _professional
{
double income;
short temper;
long time_no_see;
float new_software_company;
void love;
};
Class Guy_who_wrote_this
{
Long time_on_bench;
Double chat;
Void work();
}
{
double styles;
short skirts;
long time_to_understand_problems;
float mind;
void knowledge();
char non_co_operative;
};
class Married_female_Software _Professional
{
double weight;
short tempered;
long gossips;
float hopes;
void work();
char unstable;
};
class Female_Engaged_software _professional
{
double time_on_phone;
short attention_on_work;
long boast;
float on_cloud_nine;
void understanding();
char edgy;
};
class Newly_Married_software _professional
{
double dinner_invitations;
short time_at_work;
long lunch_breaks;
float talks;
void bank_balance();
char hen_pecked;
};
class Husband_wife_software _professional
{
double income;
short temper;
long time_no_see;
float new_software_company;
void love;
};
Class Guy_who_wrote_this
{
Long time_on_bench;
Double chat;
Void work();
}
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Interesting Facts!!!
1. If you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on your right side. If you are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on your left side.
2. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
3. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.
4. Dalmatians are born without spots.
5. Men痴 shirts have the buttons on the right, but women痴 shirts have the buttons on the left.
6. The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it痴 already been digested by a bee.
7. The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.
8. Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.
9. Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.
10. It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.
11. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!!
12. Human hair and fingernails continue to grow after death.
13. Most soccer players run 7 miles in a game.
14. The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.
15. Every day 200 million couples make love, 400,000 babies are born, and 140,000 people die.
16. Colgate faced big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command 堵o hang yourself.・
17. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.
18. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
19. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
20. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural cause.
(Provided By: Dhanpati Neupane, Software Engineer, BFIT, Thamel, Kathmandu)
2. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
3. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.
4. Dalmatians are born without spots.
5. Men痴 shirts have the buttons on the right, but women痴 shirts have the buttons on the left.
6. The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it痴 already been digested by a bee.
7. The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.
8. Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.
9. Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.
10. It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.
11. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!!
12. Human hair and fingernails continue to grow after death.
13. Most soccer players run 7 miles in a game.
14. The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.
15. Every day 200 million couples make love, 400,000 babies are born, and 140,000 people die.
16. Colgate faced big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command 堵o hang yourself.・
17. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.
18. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
19. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
20. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural cause.
(Provided By: Dhanpati Neupane, Software Engineer, BFIT, Thamel, Kathmandu)
A creepy mysterious American history
Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head
Now it gets really weird.
Lincoln 's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln .
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln , was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln , was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
Now hang on to your seat.
Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called ' Lincoln ' made by 'Ford.'
Lincoln was shot in a theater and hi s assassin ran and hid in a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theater.
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
And here's the kicker...
A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe , Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.
Creepy huh?
(Provided By: Samyukta Rupakheti)
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head
Now it gets really weird.
Lincoln 's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln .
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln , was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln , was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
Now hang on to your seat.
Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called ' Lincoln ' made by 'Ford.'
Lincoln was shot in a theater and hi s assassin ran and hid in a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theater.
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
And here's the kicker...
A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe , Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.
Creepy huh?
(Provided By: Samyukta Rupakheti)
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Honorable men!!!
"One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?"
The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.
Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with ANGELINA JOLIE "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.
"Yes," cried the woodcutter.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE , You would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ . Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my wife . Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care
of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE ।"
(Provided By: Samyukta Rupakheti, Software Engineer, BFIT, Kathmandu)
The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.
Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with ANGELINA JOLIE "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.
"Yes," cried the woodcutter.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE , You would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ . Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my wife . Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care
of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE ।"
(Provided By: Samyukta Rupakheti, Software Engineer, BFIT, Kathmandu)
Even if u answer **five** questions its great...Feel proud...
1. What programming language is GOOGLE developed in?
2. What is the expansion of YAHOO?
3. What is the expansion of ADIDAS?
4. Expansion of Star as in Star TV Network?
5. What is expansion of "ICICI?"
6. What does "baker's dozen" signify?
7. The 1984-85 season. 2nd ODI between India and Pakistan at Sialkot -
India 210/3 with Vengsarkar 94*. Match abandoned. Why?
8. Who is the only man to have written the National Anthems for two
different countries?
9. From what four word expression does the word `goodbye` derive?
10. How was Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu better known?
11. Name the only other country to have got independence on Aug 15th?
12. Why was James Bond Associated with the Number 007?
13. Who faced the first ball in the first ever One day match?
14. Which cricketer played for South Africa before it was banned from
international cricket and later represented Zimbabwe ?
15. The faces of which four Presidents are carved at Mt.Rushmore?
16. Which is the only country that is surrounded from all sides by only one
country (other than Vatican )?
17. Which is the only sport which is not allowed to play left handed?
HERE ARE THE ANSWERS
-----
-----
-----
-----
-----
Answers :
1. Google is written in Asynchronous java-script and XML, or its acronym
Ajax ..
2. Yet Another Hierarchy of Officious Oracle
3. ADIDAS- All Day I Dream About Sports
4. Satellite Television Asian Region
5. Industrial credit and Investments Corporation of India
6. A baker's dozen consists of 13 items - 1 more than the items in a normal
dozen
7. That match was abandoned after people heard the news of Indira Gandhi
being killed.
8. Rabindranath Tagore who wrote national anthem for two different
countries Indian (Jana gana mana) and Bangladesh-
(Amar Sonar* *Bangla)
9. Goodbye comes from the ex-pression: 'god be with you'.
10. Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu is none other Mother Teresa.
11. South Korea ..
12. Because 007 is the ISD code for Russia (or the USSR , as it was known
during the cold war)
13. Geoffrey Boycott
14. John Traicos
15. George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Theodore Roosevelt, and Abraham
Lincoln
16. Lesotho surrounded from all sides by South Africa ..
17. Polo.
(Provided By: Samyukta Rupakheti, Software Engineer, BFIT, Kathmandu)
2. What is the expansion of YAHOO?
3. What is the expansion of ADIDAS?
4. Expansion of Star as in Star TV Network?
5. What is expansion of "ICICI?"
6. What does "baker's dozen" signify?
7. The 1984-85 season. 2nd ODI between India and Pakistan at Sialkot -
India 210/3 with Vengsarkar 94*. Match abandoned. Why?
8. Who is the only man to have written the National Anthems for two
different countries?
9. From what four word expression does the word `goodbye` derive?
10. How was Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu better known?
11. Name the only other country to have got independence on Aug 15th?
12. Why was James Bond Associated with the Number 007?
13. Who faced the first ball in the first ever One day match?
14. Which cricketer played for South Africa before it was banned from
international cricket and later represented Zimbabwe ?
15. The faces of which four Presidents are carved at Mt.Rushmore?
16. Which is the only country that is surrounded from all sides by only one
country (other than Vatican )?
17. Which is the only sport which is not allowed to play left handed?
HERE ARE THE ANSWERS
-----
-----
-----
-----
-----
Answers :
1. Google is written in Asynchronous java-script and XML, or its acronym
Ajax ..
2. Yet Another Hierarchy of Officious Oracle
3. ADIDAS- All Day I Dream About Sports
4. Satellite Television Asian Region
5. Industrial credit and Investments Corporation of India
6. A baker's dozen consists of 13 items - 1 more than the items in a normal
dozen
7. That match was abandoned after people heard the news of Indira Gandhi
being killed.
8. Rabindranath Tagore who wrote national anthem for two different
countries Indian (Jana gana mana) and Bangladesh-
(Amar Sonar* *Bangla)
9. Goodbye comes from the ex-pression: 'god be with you'.
10. Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu is none other Mother Teresa.
11. South Korea ..
12. Because 007 is the ISD code for Russia (or the USSR , as it was known
during the cold war)
13. Geoffrey Boycott
14. John Traicos
15. George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Theodore Roosevelt, and Abraham
Lincoln
16. Lesotho surrounded from all sides by South Africa ..
17. Polo.
(Provided By: Samyukta Rupakheti, Software Engineer, BFIT, Kathmandu)
Monday, May 12, 2008
Nepal in 2050 A.D......Enjoy
Time: Year: 2050 AD
Place: Two Americans at IBM Company, USA.
Conversation of two Americans pre recorded to know the future Currency Conversion Rate: NRs. 1.00 = US$ 100.00
Note: Please be prepared for this in 2050 as it is very unusual for us at this time but its FUTURE of Nepal.
Alex : Hi John, you didn't come yesterday to office?
John : Yeah, I was in Nepalese Embassy for stamping.
Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that strict.
John : Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex : How long it took to get it stamped?
John : Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they played with him like anything. That's why it got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4 pm.
Alex : Really? In Nepal, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA.
John : Yeah, but that is because who in Nepal will be interested in coming to USA man, their economy has & been booming.
Alex : So, when are you leaving?
John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in Nepal and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Royal Nepal Airlines. Sort of dream come true.
Alex : How long are you going to stay in Nepal.
John : What do you mean by how long. I will be settled in Nepal, my company has promised me that they will process my Hariyo Patra.
Alex : Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hariyo Patra in Nepal.
John : Yeah, that's why, I am planning to marry a Nepali girl there.
Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Kathmandu, Pokhara and Biratnagar.
John : But, I prefer Nepali girls because they are beautiful and cultured.
Alex : Where did you get the offer, Kath?
John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.
Alex : I see, that's too much for US people, !Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-. Oh God! What about in Pok, Birat?
John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Kath. It is like the world headquarters of Software.
Alex : I heard, almost all the Nepalese are having one personal Robot for help.
John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for less than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Sherpa, which costs Rs.200000/- but has got a sexy design.
Alex : By the way, who is your client?
John : Upadhaya and Sharma Associates, a pure Nepalese company, specializing in Embedded Software.
Alex : Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Nepalese company. They are really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened their Fly-by-night outfits in Nepal. Nepalese companies pay you in full even when you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Birgunj, the most livable place in Nepal, probably world. There you have full freedom and no restrictions. They have one of the world's biggestdry port you see. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.
John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their footsteps.
Alex : How are you going to cope with their language?
John : Why not? From my school days I have been learning Nepali as my first language here at New York. At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Nepali and were quite impressed by my cent percent score in TONIL i.e.Test of Nepali as International Language.
Alex : So, you are going to have fun there.
John : Yeah, I will be travelling in the world's fastest train, world's largest theme park, and the famous Kollywood where you can see actors like, Rajesh Hamal, and all. Funworld is also in Kollywood.
Alex : You know, the PM is scheduled to v!isit US next year, he may then relax the number of visas.
John : That's true. Last month, Rajib Rajbhandari visited White House and donated Rs. 200000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City of Kathmandu.Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.
Alex : But, Nepalese government is planning to split Mercantile's Neposys.
John : He is a hard worker man, he can build any number of Neposys like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.
Alex : OK, Good Luck John.
John : Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a Daura Suruwal because they will think you are too Nepalised and may doubt you will ever come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But don't forget to say 'Namaste, Tapai! kasto hunuhunchha' to the Visa officer at Window 95. It seems he likes that and will not give you a visa if You don't greet him that way.Hope u enjoyed it................You will be proud to be a Nepali in 2050,
won't you?
(Provided By: Dhanpati Neupane & Samyukta Rupakheti, Software Engineers, BFIT, Thamel, Kathmamndu)
Place: Two Americans at IBM Company, USA.
Conversation of two Americans pre recorded to know the future Currency Conversion Rate: NRs. 1.00 = US$ 100.00
Note: Please be prepared for this in 2050 as it is very unusual for us at this time but its FUTURE of Nepal.
Alex : Hi John, you didn't come yesterday to office?
John : Yeah, I was in Nepalese Embassy for stamping.
Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that strict.
John : Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex : How long it took to get it stamped?
John : Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they played with him like anything. That's why it got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4 pm.
Alex : Really? In Nepal, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA.
John : Yeah, but that is because who in Nepal will be interested in coming to USA man, their economy has & been booming.
Alex : So, when are you leaving?
John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in Nepal and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Royal Nepal Airlines. Sort of dream come true.
Alex : How long are you going to stay in Nepal.
John : What do you mean by how long. I will be settled in Nepal, my company has promised me that they will process my Hariyo Patra.
Alex : Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hariyo Patra in Nepal.
John : Yeah, that's why, I am planning to marry a Nepali girl there.
Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Kathmandu, Pokhara and Biratnagar.
John : But, I prefer Nepali girls because they are beautiful and cultured.
Alex : Where did you get the offer, Kath?
John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.
Alex : I see, that's too much for US people, !Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-. Oh God! What about in Pok, Birat?
John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Kath. It is like the world headquarters of Software.
Alex : I heard, almost all the Nepalese are having one personal Robot for help.
John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for less than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Sherpa, which costs Rs.200000/- but has got a sexy design.
Alex : By the way, who is your client?
John : Upadhaya and Sharma Associates, a pure Nepalese company, specializing in Embedded Software.
Alex : Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Nepalese company. They are really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened their Fly-by-night outfits in Nepal. Nepalese companies pay you in full even when you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Birgunj, the most livable place in Nepal, probably world. There you have full freedom and no restrictions. They have one of the world's biggestdry port you see. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.
John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their footsteps.
Alex : How are you going to cope with their language?
John : Why not? From my school days I have been learning Nepali as my first language here at New York. At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Nepali and were quite impressed by my cent percent score in TONIL i.e.Test of Nepali as International Language.
Alex : So, you are going to have fun there.
John : Yeah, I will be travelling in the world's fastest train, world's largest theme park, and the famous Kollywood where you can see actors like, Rajesh Hamal, and all. Funworld is also in Kollywood.
Alex : You know, the PM is scheduled to v!isit US next year, he may then relax the number of visas.
John : That's true. Last month, Rajib Rajbhandari visited White House and donated Rs. 200000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City of Kathmandu.Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.
Alex : But, Nepalese government is planning to split Mercantile's Neposys.
John : He is a hard worker man, he can build any number of Neposys like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.
Alex : OK, Good Luck John.
John : Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a Daura Suruwal because they will think you are too Nepalised and may doubt you will ever come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But don't forget to say 'Namaste, Tapai! kasto hunuhunchha' to the Visa officer at Window 95. It seems he likes that and will not give you a visa if You don't greet him that way.Hope u enjoyed it................You will be proud to be a Nepali in 2050,
won't you?
(Provided By: Dhanpati Neupane & Samyukta Rupakheti, Software Engineers, BFIT, Thamel, Kathmamndu)
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Wedding Query.......(SQL Style)
CREATE PROCEDURE MyMarriage
BrideGroom Male (25) ,
Bride Female(20) AS
BEGIN
SELECT Bride FROM Chwak_ Brides
WHERE FatherInLaw = 'Millionaire' AND Count(Car) > 20 AND HouseStatus ='ThreeStoreyed'
AND BrideEduStatus IN (B.TECH ,BE ,Degree ,MCA ,MiBA) AND Having Brothers= Null AND Sisters =Null
SELECT Gold ,Cash,Car,BankBalance FROM FatherInLaw
UPDATE MyBankAccout SET MyBal = MyBal + FatherInLawBal
UPDATE MyLocker SET MyLockerContents = MyLockerContents + FatherInLawGold
INSERT INTO MyCarShed VALUES ('BMW')
END
GO
Then the wife writes the below query:
DROP
HUSBAND;
Commit;
Find the errors if possible...........
BrideGroom Male (25) ,
Bride Female(20) AS
BEGIN
SELECT Bride FROM Chwak_ Brides
WHERE FatherInLaw = 'Millionaire' AND Count(Car) > 20 AND HouseStatus ='ThreeStoreyed'
AND BrideEduStatus IN (B.TECH ,BE ,Degree ,MCA ,MiBA) AND Having Brothers= Null AND Sisters =Null
SELECT Gold ,Cash,Car,BankBalance FROM FatherInLaw
UPDATE MyBankAccout SET MyBal = MyBal + FatherInLawBal
UPDATE MyLocker SET MyLockerContents = MyLockerContents + FatherInLawGold
INSERT INTO MyCarShed VALUES ('BMW')
END
GO
Then the wife writes the below query:
DROP
HUSBAND;
Commit;
Find the errors if possible...........
Friday, May 9, 2008
That makes sense!!!
1. If time doesn't wait for you, don't worry!
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!
2. Expecting the world to treat u fairly coz u r a good person is like
expecting the lion not to attack u coz u r a vegetarian. Think about it.
3. Beauty isn't measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear,
but what we are inside. So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!
4. Don't walk as if you rule the world,
walk as if you don't care who rules the world!
That's called Attitude…! Keep on rocking!
5. Every lady hopes that her daughter will marry a better man than she did
and is convinced that her son will never find a wife as good as his father did!!!
6. He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair.
When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.
They said, he who never lived, cannot die!
7. A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel to the Crocodiles!
8. So many options for suicide:
Poison, sleeping pills, hanging,
jumping from a building, lying on train tracks, but we chose Marriage, slow sure!
9. Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!
10. All desirable things in life are either
illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!
11. Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahatma Gandhi
(which one to follow? Nehru or Gandhi)
12. When things go wrong, when sadness fills your heart,
When tears flows from your eyes always say these words…
(Lets drink .................)
13. 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving.
Which makes it a logical statement that
90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!
2. Expecting the world to treat u fairly coz u r a good person is like
expecting the lion not to attack u coz u r a vegetarian. Think about it.
3. Beauty isn't measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear,
but what we are inside. So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!
4. Don't walk as if you rule the world,
walk as if you don't care who rules the world!
That's called Attitude…! Keep on rocking!
5. Every lady hopes that her daughter will marry a better man than she did
and is convinced that her son will never find a wife as good as his father did!!!
6. He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair.
When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.
They said, he who never lived, cannot die!
7. A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel to the Crocodiles!
8. So many options for suicide:
Poison, sleeping pills, hanging,
jumping from a building, lying on train tracks, but we chose Marriage, slow sure!
9. Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!
10. All desirable things in life are either
illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!
11. Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahatma Gandhi
(which one to follow? Nehru or Gandhi)
12. When things go wrong, when sadness fills your heart,
When tears flows from your eyes always say these words…
(Lets drink .................)
13. 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving.
Which makes it a logical statement that
90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!
गजल पढौ है
टोलाएर एउटै गीत धेरै चोटि गाए मैले
कालि भएनि उसकै निम्ति आजसम्म धाए मैले
एक सेकेन्डमै कैयौपटक आखा जुध्थे कालिसग
नबोलेनि भित्रभित्रै गहिरो माया लाए मैले
दिनमा त उनले बोले धन्य रातमा हामि भेट्थ्यौ सधै
सपनामै मजनु बनि लैला उनलाई बनाए मैले
खै कसलाई कुन्नि हेर्थीन् उनले हुलमुलमा कहिलेकाहि
कस्तरि हेर्छे मैलाई नै भनि मौकामै मन बुझाए मैले
टोलाएर एउटै गीत धेरै चोटि गाए मैले
कालि भएनि उसकै निम्ति आजसम्म धाए मैले
(सौजन्य: हरी प्रसाद पौडेल, विद्यार्थी, पुल्चोक क्याम्पस, ललितपुर)
कालि भएनि उसकै निम्ति आजसम्म धाए मैले
एक सेकेन्डमै कैयौपटक आखा जुध्थे कालिसग
नबोलेनि भित्रभित्रै गहिरो माया लाए मैले
दिनमा त उनले बोले धन्य रातमा हामि भेट्थ्यौ सधै
सपनामै मजनु बनि लैला उनलाई बनाए मैले
खै कसलाई कुन्नि हेर्थीन् उनले हुलमुलमा कहिलेकाहि
कस्तरि हेर्छे मैलाई नै भनि मौकामै मन बुझाए मैले
टोलाएर एउटै गीत धेरै चोटि गाए मैले
कालि भएनि उसकै निम्ति आजसम्म धाए मैले
(सौजन्य: हरी प्रसाद पौडेल, विद्यार्थी, पुल्चोक क्याम्पस, ललितपुर)
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Chinese gives Slap
A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.
As he wnas a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap ad says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here."
The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your PearlHarbour, it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me."
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."
(Provided By: Navaraj Bogatee)
As he wnas a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap ad says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here."
The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your PearlHarbour, it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me."
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."
(Provided By: Navaraj Bogatee)
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Honesty is the Best Policy
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.
"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed," she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."
"Don't worry," Jack said. "We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."
The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.
They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
But about nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north ab out 9 months ago ?"
"Yes, I do." said Bob
"Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"
"Well, um, yes!," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned beet red and he said, "Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything."
"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed," she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."
"Don't worry," Jack said. "We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."
The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.
They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
But about nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north ab out 9 months ago ?"
"Yes, I do." said Bob
"Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"
"Well, um, yes!," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned beet red and he said, "Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything."
Monday, May 5, 2008
Tongue Twisters.................(Have a Try)
1. If you understand, say "understand". If you don't understand, say "don't understand". But if you understand and say "don't understand".How do I understand that you understand? Understand!
2. I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
3. Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.
4. A sailor went to sea to see, what he could see. And all he could see was sea, sea, sea.
5. Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People
6. If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?
7. I thought a thought.But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought. If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.
8. Once a fellow met a fellow In a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, "If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow What a fellow means?"
9. Mr Inside went over to see Mr Outside. Mr Inside stood outside and called to MrOutside inside. Mr Outside answered Mr Inside from inside and Told Mr Inside to come inside. Mr Inside said "NO", and told Mr Outside to come outside. MrOutside and Mr Inside argued from inside and outside about going outside or coming inside. Finally, Mr Outside coaxed Mr Inside to come inside, then both Mr Outside and Mr Inside went outside to the riverside.
10. SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS ON THE SEA SHORE , BUT THE SEA SHELLS THAT SHE SELLS, ON THE SEA SHORE ARE NOT THE REAL ONES
11. The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.
12. If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors?
"When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor's the doctor. Does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor's way"
13. We surely shall see the sun shine shortly. Whether the weather be fine, Or whether the weather be not, Whether the weather be cold Or whether the weather be hot, We'll weather the weather Whatever the weather, Whether we like it or not. watch? Whether the weather is hot. Whether the weather is cold. Whether the weather is either or not. It is whether we like it or not.
14. Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely.
15. A flea and a fly in a flue Said the fly "Oh what should we do" Said the flea" Let us fly Said the fly"Let us flee" So they flew through a flaw in the flue
16. If you tell Tom to tell a tongue-twister his tongue will be twisted as tongue-twister twists tongues.
17. Mr. See owned a saw.And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore.Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.But it was sad to see Soar so sore Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw
2. I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
3. Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.
4. A sailor went to sea to see, what he could see. And all he could see was sea, sea, sea.
5. Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People
6. If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?
7. I thought a thought.But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought. If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.
8. Once a fellow met a fellow In a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, "If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow What a fellow means?"
9. Mr Inside went over to see Mr Outside. Mr Inside stood outside and called to MrOutside inside. Mr Outside answered Mr Inside from inside and Told Mr Inside to come inside. Mr Inside said "NO", and told Mr Outside to come outside. MrOutside and Mr Inside argued from inside and outside about going outside or coming inside. Finally, Mr Outside coaxed Mr Inside to come inside, then both Mr Outside and Mr Inside went outside to the riverside.
10. SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS ON THE SEA SHORE , BUT THE SEA SHELLS THAT SHE SELLS, ON THE SEA SHORE ARE NOT THE REAL ONES
11. The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.
12. If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors?
"When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor's the doctor. Does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor's way"
13. We surely shall see the sun shine shortly. Whether the weather be fine, Or whether the weather be not, Whether the weather be cold Or whether the weather be hot, We'll weather the weather Whatever the weather, Whether we like it or not. watch? Whether the weather is hot. Whether the weather is cold. Whether the weather is either or not. It is whether we like it or not.
14. Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely.
15. A flea and a fly in a flue Said the fly "Oh what should we do" Said the flea" Let us fly Said the fly"Let us flee" So they flew through a flaw in the flue
16. If you tell Tom to tell a tongue-twister his tongue will be twisted as tongue-twister twists tongues.
17. Mr. See owned a saw.And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore.Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.But it was sad to see Soar so sore Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Coincidence (Hot Joke)!!!
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after dinner, she would like to have sex with him for the first time.
The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacy to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about half an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy a 3-pack, 10-pack or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents! Come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!"
The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacy to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about half an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy a 3-pack, 10-pack or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents! Come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!"
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Friday, May 2, 2008
She is a woman!!!
If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman
If you don't, you are not a man
If you praise her, she thinks you are lying
If you don't, you are good for nothing
If you agree to all her likes, you are a wimp
If you don't, you are not understanding
If you visit her often, she thinks it is boring
If you don't, she accuses you of double-crossing
If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy
If you don't, you are a dull boy
If you are jealous, she says it's bad
If you don't, she thinks you do not love her
If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her
If you don't, she thinks you do not like her
If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait
If she is late, she says that's a girl's way
If you visit another man, you're not putting in "quality time"
If she is visited by another woman, "oh it's natural, we are girls"
If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold
If you kiss her often, she yells that you are taking advantage
If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics
If you do, she thinks it's just one of men's tactics for seduction
She is a womanIf you stare at another woman, she accuses you of flirting
If she is stared by other men, she says that they are just admiring
If you talk, she wants you to listen
If you listen, she wants you to talk
In short:
So simple, yet so complex
So weak, yet so powerful
So damning, yet so wonderful
So confusing, yet so desirable......
If you don't, you are not a man
If you praise her, she thinks you are lying
If you don't, you are good for nothing
If you agree to all her likes, you are a wimp
If you don't, you are not understanding
If you visit her often, she thinks it is boring
If you don't, she accuses you of double-crossing
If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy
If you don't, you are a dull boy
If you are jealous, she says it's bad
If you don't, she thinks you do not love her
If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her
If you don't, she thinks you do not like her
If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait
If she is late, she says that's a girl's way
If you visit another man, you're not putting in "quality time"
If she is visited by another woman, "oh it's natural, we are girls"
If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold
If you kiss her often, she yells that you are taking advantage
If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics
If you do, she thinks it's just one of men's tactics for seduction
She is a womanIf you stare at another woman, she accuses you of flirting
If she is stared by other men, she says that they are just admiring
If you talk, she wants you to listen
If you listen, she wants you to talk
In short:
So simple, yet so complex
So weak, yet so powerful
So damning, yet so wonderful
So confusing, yet so desirable......
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